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From Zilch to Fame: A Comically Foolproof Guide to Becoming an Internet Sensation
Ah, my dear aspiring writers and internet enthusiasts, gather ‘round and brace yourselves for an uproarious adventure into the wild world of online fame! If you’ve ever dreamt of going from a fledgling writer with more tumbleweeds than readers to an internet sensation with followers galore, worry not! Brandt Amelia, the self-proclaimed expert on hilariously failing and miraculously succeeding, is here to share some rib-tickling tips on how to get views, increase reads, and grow your following!
Step one on your journey to stardom: embrace the llama lifestyle. Why llamas, you ask? Because llamas are the epitome of “cool and chill.” Channel your inner llama, and let the stress roll off you like water off a duck’s back. Sure, your friends might think you’re a bit “spit”-zy, but what do they know? Llamas are the new zen masters, and you’re on your way to enlightenment — or at least internet enlightenment.
Find Your Niche (or Ditch It Altogether)
Ah, niches, the elusive creatures that haunt every aspiring writer’s dreams. Some say finding your niche is crucial, but we say, “What’s a niche?” Why stick to just one topic when you can be the master of all trades and the jack of none? Write about cooking tips for single-celled organisms or interpretive dance for…